Have you ever stopped yourself to wonder if your company has a communication problem?

Like many people, my siblings and I often text each other and our 81-year-old mother in a group message. What makes this interesting is when our mother relies on voice-to-text to send us messages, due to her poor eyesight. She assumes that her phone has a clear understanding of what she is saying and simply hits “send” without proofreading her message. 

For anyone who has attempted this or has auto-fill/correct on their phone, you likely understand the importance of proofreading messages before sending them. What often follows is a steady stream of texts, with each of us attempting to “translate” what we think our mother said. 

About 40ish messages later, we’ve stopped laughing and the conversation moves on. Sound familiar at all? It’s yet another take on the classic “telephone game”.

The Problem With Workplace Communication

Unfortunately, this very scenario (minus the laughter common amongst siblings) is what often plays out in the corporate environment. A conversation held in a meeting is relayed to others, an email is sent, a notice is posted, and everyone is left to their own interpretation of what was really said.

Or worse yet, a question is asked, no one speaks up, or everyone nods in agreement with the one comment offered, and the leader leaves thinking “we’re all on the same page.” Then they wonder why there is confusion, frustration, lack of direction, and results? Again, sound familiar?

How about feedback. Is it something that is openly offered and asked for? Is it something that you only receive once or twice a year, usually at performance reviews? 

Is most of the feedback you give and receive done at the water cooler (the actual one or the virtual one)? If feedback is not something that is actively shared on a day to day basis, then you know you have a communication problem.

What’s even more frustrating is that this is not something new. Communication problems are not a byproduct of all the immediate changes corporate America had to adapt due to COVID-19. 

This business problem is something that has been plaguing workplaces for as long as there have been workplaces. So how do you fix this? 

Ways to Uncover Workplace Communication Issues

Well, one could take the Thomas Jefferson approach. Legend has it that when they were building the University of Virginia, Jefferson would sit atop Monticello with a telescope in hand and watch the goings-on. When he spotted something that needed changing, he would send one of his hired hands down to the workers with instructions. 

While this ensured clear lines of communication, it was extremely expensive and time-consuming. It’s very likely this is where the term micromanaging originated!

So how do we do it? How do we verify whether there, in fact, is a communication problem? Several different tools have been used, each with positive and negative results. Let’s look at a few of these:

1. Town Halls

This is typically where a top leader addresses a large assembly of workers to update them on the goings-on of the company. Following this update, the leader opens things up to questions from the floor. This is great in theory – IF the organization already has a culture of open communication up and down throughout the company.

2. Anonymous Suggestion Boxes

I’ll stop at the “anonymous” part. If your communication needs to be anonymous, then you have your answer!

3. Employee Engagement Surveys

While these have proven to be effective, you need to spend the time to understand what’s going on and why. 

You need to be analyzing the subjective comments, holding focus groups, summarizing the findings, assigning action items to cross-functional groups and more, all with the hopes that you can quickly employ solutions before the next survey, or before the world presents the next big challenge to your organization.

The Best Way to Solve Workplace Communication Problems

Many have uttered, in frustration, “There has to be a better way!” And they’re right. How about starting with an assessment? If you think about it, most areas where you are attempting to improve begin with an assessment. 

The yearly physical with your doctor begins with a health assessment. Fitness programs start with a fitness assessment, so you know which exercises and specific weights to begin with. 

Most cognitive and behavioral programs begin with an assessment, and so on. So, why shouldn’t the evaluation of your company communication begin with one?

Now let me be clear, the assessment is the beginning, NOT the answer. It can give you valuable insights into strengths, gaps, and where to focus your attention. The findings help to shed light on opportunity areas that you weren’t aware of -like the corporate telephone game. 

What I often see in organizations, and this gets exaggerated the larger the organization is, is the farther down the “food chain” one is, the bigger the gap in effective communication. Why is this? Shouldn’t all of us be on the same page? Shouldn’t we all know where we are going and how we’re going to get there? 

Now I realize there are key strategy pieces and long-term visioning that aren’t practical to share with everyone, especially in publicly traded organizations. That said, the things we all work on in the day-to-day shouldn’t be a surprise to anyone.

There is certainly no shortage of assessments one can pursue to determine the best fit for their organization. Many organizations are blessed to have talented learning professionals already working for them who can design their own assessments. 

If you are choosing this route, begin with that you want to know, with the end in mind. For example, design your questions to support the notion that your organization is exceptional in this area (My leader regularly updates me on ___, I have a clear understanding of my role, our objectives, I receive regular feedback…) and more. The results will show you where you need to focus your efforts.

I would be remiss if I didn’t mention that Fierce offers two assessments, a Fierce Factor Assessment for individuals, to see where the communication they are having in their head is helping or hurting them, and another for groups (intact teams, departments, or entire organizations). 

Each is a series of questions designed to help in showing how aligned the individual or group actually is. In other words, if there is a large gap in the perspective (or context) of the group, then there is serious work to do in the way the group communicates.

After reviewing the initial results, teams are then instructed to look at each question individually, beginning with the question with the lowest average score. They then lean into the sometimes uncomfortable yet productive conversation around what they can do to improve in this area. 

I’ve yet to see an instance where communication is not improved as a result of this exercise.

So why not do yourself, and everyone else in your organization a favor? Give your communication skills an assessment to see if everyone is on the same page. 

If you find they aren’t, great! Celebrate the fact that NOW you know what needs to be done to avoid the corporate telephone game which almost always results in confusion, frustration, lack of direction, and results.

If you’re in Leadership & Development or HR, I can only begin to imagine how many conversations you’ve had (or with individuals on your team) related to complaints about someone else’s behavior.

If that wasn’t bad enough, you then have the additional ache of realizing that those same employees — and potentially your culture as a whole — do not have the needed courage, skill, or even motivation to actually say what needs to be said and to solve the very problem they’re coming to you to fix!

Just so you know: you’re hardly alone!

This is one of the predominant issues we hear from our clients, from L&D/HR folks just like you! And though I could provide you an “answer,” in simply saying, “Hire, Fierce!” I do have a few other thoughts that will provide you some ideas, some respite from the stream of office visits, and most importantly, some results!

Let’s level the playing field to start. All of us,  no matter our years of experience, our area of expertise, our seniority  — or lack thereof  — know that actually talking about what’s going on, naming the problem(s), stepping into conversation IS what is required.

Were we to give a pop quiz and ask everyone, “What is the most important skill you can develop and utilize to strengthen relationships and get things done?” Communicate effectively would be the highest-percentage answer.

Knowing that we should have a difficult conversation is not the problem. Knowing how to have it is  — and then having the courage to actually do it!

Short of training your entire company in the how, here are a few *simple* tactics you can use the next time someone enters your office, your cubicle, or your training room hoping you can solve all their problems:

1. Audit your existing training.

Look at all the training that already exists within your organization, that you’ve already rolled out, that’s implemented and in place. What resources currently exist that people have been exposed to? Leadership development. Basic communication skills. Conflict resolution. Performance management.

Then, let your employees do some self-discovery instead of you being an endless-font of resources. Ask, “What existing training are you aware of that might speak to this issue?” And “What next steps could you take to utilize that training as it relates to this issue?”

We spend a lot — and invest so much — in giving the people in our organizations as many tools as possible to be effective and successful. Somehow, “out of sight, out of mind” reigns and unless we practice what we’ve learned, it slips from our memory and our motivation.

Maximize those investments and refer folks back to all the good work you’ve already done to equip and support them.

2. Connect the dots between communication and training.

Consider ways to intentionally integrate questions into any training you provide (technical, Quality Assurance, new-hire onboarding, anything!) that help learners make connections between the subject matter being taught and the need for communication/conversation related to such.

For example, “Based on what we’re learning today, where, how, and with whom can you engage in conversations that will strengthen adoption?” “If we do not have the ability or willingness to effectively communicate what we’re learning here today, what will the cost be to your team, the organization, and you?” And, “If you could have direct and effective conversations with others about today’s subject matter, what results might you experience? Your team? The organization?”

Though learning how to communicate effectively and having the kinds of conversations that actually get results is critical to a leader’s growth, an organization’s growth, anyone’s growth, we can maximize our focus on such in everything else we train instead of waiting for designated dollars or curriculum.

3. Remember your company’s value.

Pay attention to your well-articulated values, mission statement, and vision. For most organizations, embedded right in the midst of well-crafted words, is a mandate to communicate in proactive and mature ways, to treat others with respect, to choose curiosity, etc.

Again, how do you help them recognize and apply this for themselves? “Which of our corporate values do you feel is at risk given this issue?” “Which aspect of our vision are you struggling to uphold when it comes to this issue?” “What conversations could you have (and with whom) to open up a dialogue about best practices and specific next-steps toward fulfilling this value/vision?”

In all three of these examples, I hope you see (and pluck) some low-hanging fruit. Not surprisingly, my strongest recommendation (and hope on your behalf) is that you can buy the whole orchard, that you can bring in a company that understands your pain, that sees the kinds of issues you are dealing with on a daily basis (and over and over again), that can give your people not just a motivational pitch about “why” communication matters, but the specific, practical, and repeatable “how!”

Oh, the time you’d get back! Oh, the culture you’d shape! And oh, the results you’d drive! But when that isn’t in the cards for you just yet, try these three tips.

At Fierce, we end nearly every one of our workshops with this statement from our founder and CEO, Susan Scott: “While no single conversation is guaranteed to change the trajectory of a career, a company, a relationship, or a life, any single conversation can.”

Having open, honest dialogue has always been critical for businesses. Now, more than ever, we are in unprecedented times because of the COVID-19 pandemic. With stay at home orders, the economy struggling, and many business leaders making very hard decisions, having honest discussions is more important than ever.

On top of that, in the last couple of weeks, many companies have moved to remote working, which brings a whole host of other challenges.

Virtual teams lack the benefits of body language and other cues, which makes it more difficult for people to decipher the meaning and sincerity of each other’s words and actions. They don’t have the water cooler conversations and other casual office discussions that help build rapport, trust and relationships.

Remote working also causes employees to rely much more heavily on email, texting, and instant messaging to communicate, which are easier to misinterpret than in-person or video calls.

For remote workers, the lack of face time or in-person time with their co-workers presents fewer opportunities to raise concerns and issues with one another. It becomes easier to let conflict build. It also becomes easier to triangulate — complain about a problem to others instead of going directly to the person with whom you have the issue.

Without direct input from the other person, we tend to make up stories about what motivated their behavior and act as if our stories are a sacred truth.

At Fierce, we call all of these various situations Conversation Chaos — that endless cycle of ineffective conversations that depress morale, feed uncertainty, and sap productivity. And it turns out that this chaos gets amplified in a remote-work world.

Our Founder, Susan Scott, just launched an whitepaper titled: Conversation Chaos in the Digital Age: Why Feedback is the Key to Successful Remote Working. In this paper, she talks about why curiosity — ultimately in the form of feedback — helps create a healthy culture, and how a Fierce client used virtual training to create a healthy dialogue for their teams. She also share some tips you can immediately use.

Download the paper here and put a stop to your conversation chaos today.

One of the biggest misses by organizations large or small is creating AND maintaining a winning talent strategy. Over the past several years, leaders have been utilizing a method you may have heard of or even use yourself: THE “WHOLE PERSON” APPROACH.

The whole person approach is a holistic way of looking at development and training — it takes into account the individual’s vision for themselves in all areas of life and provides the supportive resources they need to help make that vision a reality. The intended result is self-actualization.

This approach is often employed as a talent strategy to improve retention, culture, and profitability. But there’s more to it than simply adopting a holistic mentality or spending a training budget. To be successful, it needs to be backed by action and key conversations.

As I mentioned, many businesses and leaders are already aware of the “whole-person” approach and believe they’re promoting it within their organizations, BUT many are overlooking important factors that determine whether this approach will succeed or fail.

Why This Approach is Different

Daniel Kahneman, Nobel Prize winner and author of Thinking, Fast and Slow, proved through his studies that people act from emotion first, rationality second. We are emotionally-driven creatures, and the “whole-person” approach knows this. Everyone in an organization is coming to the table with emotions, and these emotions are fueling their decisions.

Knowing this and creating systems around it to support it is how you go where you need to go as an organization. Otherwise, your approach won’t change anything in terms of behavior.

Unlike more traditional, one-area-only, or skill-based approaches, developing the “whole person” requires an investment in professional, personal, and skill-related areas in a way that supports mental, emotional, spiritual, and physical well-being.

In addition to providing basic needs, it provides the resources required for an individual to feel empowered in moving toward self-actualization. Just as the external and business environment is shifting, so are the needs of the individuals who are a part of it.

THE WHOLE-PERSON APPROACH also involves being even more focused on the person’s ability to navigate not just in the area of skill development, but also the larger requirement of self-awareness and goals. It also allows individuals to take ownership of their own development, using their emotions as a compass — they are able to determine areas of focus, what they need, and provides the resources to follow through.

In this way, the desire for growth is “self-generated,” which goes a long way in retaining talent.

Here are some elements you can incorporate to succeed in this approach:

1. Learn about the individual.

It’s impossible to support what you don’t know, so it’s important to get to know individuals in your organization on a personal level through conversation. Ask them about their unique interests, goals, and needs, and discuss how their role and the organization can support the vision they have for themselves.

2. Individualized coaching.

Leaders need to both receive and provide emotional support, and approach development as a never-ending journey full of ups and downs. COACHING CONVERSATIONS AND MENTORING PROGRAMS can go a long way in supporting the whole person, and if budget is limited, make sure the resources that are available are customizable for each individual.

3. Training.

Providing strategic and hard skills training is an important part of a holistic approach, and this training needs to be accompanied by feedback so that new behaviors are reinforced and course-corrected. Growth is slowed and stunted when we’re not given regular feedback on ways we can improve.

To Achieve the “Whole-Person” Approach, You Have to Start Talking

On an organizational level, taking a holistic approach is a bit more complex. It requires an in-depth audit of the employee journey. Here are some important questions you need to be asking:

• Where are you currently encouraging the whole person to show up, and where are you falling short?
• If people are wanting to be themselves and develop as a person, what systems, values, and investments are we making to support that?
• What are you doing to strengthen relationships, provoke learning, and support a culture of psychological safety?

With the rising trend of meditation and mindfulness practices, communication skills and training can be misperceived as old school, based on the assumption that if you’re mindful, you don’t need training. The truth is that mindfulness and communication skills go hand in hand.

How we communicate flows into being mindful and having intentionality with how you show up, and conversation skills are what allow you to successfully bring that intentionality into relationships.

Whatever skills you have within the company, you will bring to all areas of life as a husband, wife, parent, friend, or sibling. Not employing training and development around communication is, in fact, a BIG miss.

The old-school notion of having a work self and a separate outside-of-work self is dying. Employees expect to work for a company where they can be authentic — where they feel psychologically safe enough to express their true thoughts and feelings.

There are two primary ways leaders can create this environment within organizations, and both are essential:

1. Communicate that authenticity is valued. 

This is a given, but you’d be surprised at how many organizations fail to communicate “your voice matters” directly to their employees. Leaders need to initiate the conversation about authenticity and clearly communicate its value. When a leader expresses that they want to know your true thoughts and feelings, it can shift an entire culture by making it “safe” to show up as your true self.

2. Model authentic behavior.

If leaders do not know how to get real and show up as their true selves—which includes providing honest FEEDBACK and having a willingness to CONFRONT others when necessary—it will bleed into the company culture. Employees will not feel comfortable sharing their perspectives in an environment where leaders do not practice what they preach.

Taking Steps toward “Wholeness”

The whole person approach doesn’t just need to be woven into an organization’s fabric via leadership training programs — it needs to be integrated into every aspect of an organization, from recruiting to onboarding to processes to employee journey and offboarding.

The bottom line is the more you treat people in a human way and get to know each other on a deeper level, the better your business will run.

Woah, what a year! That’s my initial reaction reflecting on 2019. What a year — in all its blessings and lessons. Based on the thousands of hours of conversations that I have had with our fierce community, you’ve shared similar sentiments with me.

When the Fierce team embarked on our 2019 year, we had a primary focus to listen and engage with our community more than we ever had before. This influenced many different Fierce initiatives, including a listening tour.

The listening tour consisted of 10 in-person, intimate roundtable conversations in cities around North America. (Thank you for all of those who joined me and for the amazing Fierce team who supported them!)

My hope for the tour was threefold: to exchange new ideas, to inform important decisions for the business, and to strengthen our relationships. I concluded the last one in Seattle this past Friday and can say without a doubt that we accomplished all of these goals, and then some.

The biggest takeaway from these conversations? 2019 was a big year for learning, which highlighted the need for even more learning in the years to come. 

Many challenges were shared from the trenches. From doing more work with fewer resources to embracing new technology to navigating the ever-changing external landscape, and so much more.

When I asked what is required to be successful in tackling these challenges, the response became clear: everyone, from the top down, needs to be more open to learning than ever before.

This same sentiment has been true for Fierce. Let me share a few thoughts below on the eve of this new year:

First, Fierce celebrated its 18-year anniversary as a company this past June. We have learned so much as a team and an organization. Developing a deep knowledge of best practice and expertise that we are able to share with the world.

Most importantly, we are learning how to continue to best serve all of our courageous facilitators and clients who embrace change, who help their people and teams have the conversations they need to have.

Second, for me personally, this year concludes my first full year in my role as President of Fierce, and I continue to be so honored to do this work; it is humbling.

I consider what I do a profound privilege and a serious responsibility. I want to thank our amazing Fierce team for waking up every day with the spirit to be on this adventure together and do the hard work it takes.

While there is so much value in reflecting on this past year, it is looking forward that fills me with excitement and energy. This is especially true this year, as there is no better way to start a brand new decade than with a focus on learning.

So as we look into the new decade, you may ask yourself  some version of these questions:

• What do you want to achieve?
• What do you want to keep doing?
• What do you want to stop doing?
• What do you want to start doing?

The first question often has the most standard, tangible responses: Change jobs. Get a promotion. Take on more responsibilities. Buy a new house. Build a new relationship. Achieve a new bodyweight.

But, what if this new decade isn’t about “arriving” somewhere specific as much as it is about evolving and building a better, more authentic version of you and of your life?

And if that is your focus, then the question becomes: Who do I want to be, and what do I need to learn to get there? What would shift if you created a life of learning?

Building a “life of learning” hits home with me both professionally and personally. Professionally, I often share with our employees that we must be focused on getting better every single day – at a specific task, at a specific technique, at what we do to help our clients, and each other, have better conversations.

Whatever it is, if we are learning every single day, I know our desired outcomes will follow. I love that our Fierce team often reminds me of these concepts and supports me through it all.

So, in order for us to get better and try new things, we have to be willing to fail. We have to be willing to take smart risks. This is what I want for our company – and for you.

Personally, building a life of learning highlights one of my favorite quotes from Annie Dillard: “How you spend your day is how you spend your life.”

I know that if I want to have an authentic, contributing, life of learning, I need to be filling my days with authenticity, giving to others, and consistently educating myself.

One of the ways I have focused on this since I was 18 is traveling to at least one new country a year. This has been a deep commitment to myself to learn and explore. Ultimately, there are hundreds of ways to live a life — people eat, sleep, pray, dream differently — and every time I learn more about a different culture, the more I learn about myself.

How to Begin Your Learning Journey

So, how can you start leading a life of learning? Here are questions to ask yourself that will ensure you are headed in the right direction:

1. Challenge yourself to think differently about a situation or person. Where in your life do you want better results? Start there.
2. Build a vision for who you want to be rather than what you want to have or own. How would you want someone important to you to describe you? Begin crafting.
3. Embrace uncomfortable situations. Where can you scare yourself a little? We learn the most when we leave our comfort zones. Just do it.
4. Surround yourself with people who help you learn. Who in your life do you admire? Have a conversation and tell them.
5. Take leaps and being willing to fail. What are you holding on to? Have that conversation with yourself.

At the start of the last decade, December 2010 I was the 7th Fierce employee at the ripe age of 24. I would have never in a million years been able to predict the profound journey I was embarking on.

Every single person has been a mentor to me — whether intentionally or unintentionally. I know that my desire to learn every single day helped form the path behind me — and it will help form the path ahead.

As we move into 2020, I am re-energized to embrace learning like never before, and can’t wait to see where it leads me, and Fierce.

It’s an exciting time and one that I am so proud to be a part of.

Building a life of learning is not for the faint of heart,  so I leave you with a poem from Tyler Knott Gregson:

If I do not follow you

out of this zone of comfort

I’ve lived safely inside,

Push me, pull me, or

throw me from that circle. If my wander loses

its lust, if the soles of my feet

begin to rust, if I forget

the way to adventure,

force it upon me until I

remember; demand a

life five thousand shades

from ordinary. 

My hope for you in this next decade is that you demand a life five thousand shades from ordinary. No more waiting. No more stalling. The time is now.

Ensure you have people who will push you out of your comfort zone. People who have the conversations you most need to have — even when they are hard.

And, in case you need to hear this: your fierce community and I are here ready to join you on this adventure…one fierce conversation at a time.

Whether you’re from the American Midwest, or you know someone from the region, you’ve most likely at some point or another had a conversation about the idea of, “Midwest Nice.”

My parents met at Cleveland State University. My mom grew up smack dab in the middle of Cleveland, while my dad grew up in the burbs one-hour east. In short, most of my gene pool lives in Ohio. And because I have never lived in Ohio, I’m a rare species in the Mason/Engle clan.

This is because I get to look from the outside in, and I’ve developed a keen sense of sniffing out “Midwest Nice” pretty quickly.

It tends to look like the following:

• Always keeping a smile on your face…especially when you disagree with something.
• Sweeping thoughts and conversation under the rug very quickly when a topic is brought up you don’t want to talk about.
• Being a firm believer that, “if you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all.”
• When a controversial statement is made, responding with “well, be nice.”
• Stating your opinion when promoted, but immediately following it up with, “but we can do whatever you want.”

Yep, tell-tale signs of Midwest Nice.

The important thing to note here is that Midwest Nice isn’t the only form of “nice” that shows up throughout the world (and in the workplace) — and they’ve got their own tell-tale signs too.

Our organization, Fierce Conversations, has this special ability to sniff out cultures of nice as well, as these cultures tend to sneak their way into problems our clients come to us to resolve and they don’t even realize it.

As I wrote in the piece, The Dark Side of Niceness: How Honesty is Taking a Backseat in the Workplace, the results of our recent research on the impact niceness has on the workplace confirmed how we would define cultures that are overly nice.

Nearly 63 percent of employees chose not to share a concern or negative feedback at work because they were fearful of being seen as combative and then kept their concerns and feedback to themselves.

Respondents said it’s important to be considered nice because:

1. They find work is more enjoyable when they get along with their colleagues.
2. It makes it easier to get things done.
3. They will get more interesting work/more opportunities if people like working with them.

We all want the above things: enjoyable, easier, and more interesting work – sign me up, please!

Here’s what often gets overlooked: The three reasons above can happen while still sharing concerns and feedback with colleagues – in a productive and relationship-enriching way.

What’s So Bad About Being “Nice”?

You should not keep those to yourself. So, why is it so bad to keep concerns and comments to yourself?

It is not healthy. When you keep negative thoughts or secrets to yourself, there is scientific evidence that stress hormones, such as cortisol, increase, and your health is affected.

“Sleep may be disturbed, which could lead to emotional mood swings and a propensity to be ill-tempered or lose your cool,” Allen Towfigh, MD, a neurologist and sleep medicine specialist at New York-Presbyterian Hospital/Cornell Medical Center, recently told Forbes. 

“You may also have difficulty with memory and learning. And the excess release of cortisol will cause a host of other ailments, including possible increase or loss of appetite and disruption of metabolism,” he said.

If it goes even further to keep a secret, Art Markman shares, “The stress caused by secrets arises because people think about the information they are keeping secret often — even when they are not around the person they are hiding the information from. These thoughts cause stress and make people feel as though they are not acting authentically.

”It creates a dump truck effect. During a Fierce training about Confront we recount a personal story about a woman, Sara, who shares that her boss bothers her over and over and over again.

Then, one Wednesday afternoon, her boss does one small thing, and Sara unloads the entire dump truck of her frustrations. Months of examples and all the emotions that go along with them.

I shouldn’t have to say this: That’s not effective.

It is not authentic. We can all sniff fake from a mile away. When someone is not disclosing something to you, you sense it. Misalignment with personal values is often cited as a big reason for career change and shifts. 

If you are a leader, you want your organization, team, and employees to be healthy, to address issues as they come, and to be authentic and dedicated. Ultimately, these results in top and bottom line health, productivity, and happiness.

Signs of a “Culture of Nice”

So, how do you know when you are part of a “Culture of Nice”?

The top signs we’ve seen from Fierce clients are:

1. Conversations, negative or positive, are absent.
2. You can’t remember the last time someone at your workplace said something that was hard for you to hear.
3. Mistakes are handled in inconsistent ways or just not handled at all.
4. Relationships in the organization are built in various ways that may not be conducive to being authentic and real with one another.
5. Expectations are shifted or changed based on various factors, rather than grounded in reality and moving the business forward.

Another major way leaders can determine if their organization is fostering a “Culture of Nice” is by understanding the ways this niceness culture shows up. 

Below, you can find the most common cultures of nice and what they tend to look like at organizations:

Three Types of “Cultures of Nice

1. Only Smiles Can Live Here.

A culture where there is legislated optimism. The expectation is that each employee keeps the atmosphere positive, and therefore, employees associate bringing up concerns or addressing issues head-on as negative and going against the status quo.Ways to tell:

• Most meetings including head nods and smiles.
• It’s frowned upon to bring a concern to an individual in either a group or individual setting.
• When someone makes a mistake, it is often greeted with positive reinforcement or not at all – instead of accountability.
• Relationships are built on others supporting one another and reinforcing how everyone is doing the best they can – often at the cost of not challenging one another.

2. Respect with a Capital R AKA “Don’t Question Me.”

A culture where employees associate respect with agreeing with each other on the surface. This culture of nice does not encourage sharing concerns with individuals who may potentially have shortsighted or disconnected ideas or strategies because it is considered disrespectful to do so. Ways to tell:

• It’s not encouraged to have competing views at meetings, and rather, it’s expected to support the meeting leaders.
• Before meetings, other meetings occur to make sure that certain people will be supporting and respecting what is discussed during the meeting.
• Autonomy in decision-making is important, however, decisions are often made by a small few.
• Relationships are built on who you know and how much you support the brilliance of the people with authority and decision-making power.

3. Passive-Aggressive Party of Many 

A culture where an undercurrent exists. Everything seems positive on the surface, however, there are tensions that show through. On the outside, the culture seems to be positive, however, when you dig deeper, you realize the “audio” doesn’t match the “video.”Ways to tell:

• Meetings often have one or two people active in the conversations, while the others are disengaged – checking their phones and emails or staring into outer space.
• People share positive experiences and seem happy, however, engagement scores or other metrics share a different story.
• Relationships are built on coalitions and agreements on what, who, and how to support certain people and items over others. Cliques live here.

Now, I want to take a second to highlight that I’m not saying niceness is a bad thing in the workplace because it absolutely is not.

That said, we must reframe what nice is at the office. It’s not about beating around a topic. It is not about pandering to a few. It is not about keeping your feelings and thoughts to yourself and potentially lashing out after. It is not about faking a smile out of fear of retaliation.

I have stepped into each of these cultures while doing our Fierce work. I have stepped into these cultures while stepping into family’s and friends’ homes as well.

In order to combat “nice” cultures, it takes time. This does not change overnight. However, once you start paying attention to the signs, you know where the work needs to take place.

I want to hear from you. Do you believe you are part of a “Culture of Nice”? Let us know by clicking on the chat icon to the right. I’m looking forward to hearing your story.

When new managers step into their role, there is so much to do, so much to make happen, and so much to learn. On top of all this, they now have people depending on them for their development and growth!

How are these first-time managers going to make all this happen? How are they to remain focused on their own priorities, responsibilities, and to-do’s while simultaneously building the capacity of their team?

Enter delegation.

Perhaps not the sexiest of solves, but by far, the one that will merit them (and those who work with/for them) the best results.

Consider the data: a recent study by Gallup revealed that businesses with leaders who were “high in delegator talent” grew 112 percent faster than those without. If you want to be successful as a manager, learning how to effectively delegate is going to be an essential part of long-term success for you and your team.

John C. Maxwell, prolific leadership author, says, “If you want to do a few small things right, do them yourself. If you want to do great things and make a big impact, learn to delegate.”

He’s absolutely right.

But, here’s where it gets a bit messy: few leaders, let alone new ones, are clear on what delegation actually means, what it looks like, and how to make it happen.

A common misunderstanding among leaders — both new and those who have been managing for decades — is that delegation is about giving away the tasks we don’t want to do.

At Fierce, we call this dele-dumping.

Sure, it’s articulated far differently depending on your place of work. But, the most common one we hear is, “This will be a great development opportunity for you!”

Here’s the thing though… people are not deceived. Direct reports are smart! They are aware that their manager is offloading tasks that are definitely not their favorites.

So yes, the manager or leader has technically “delegated,” but they’ve accomplished little-to-nothing related to improving engagement, bettering relationships, and building emotional capital — which is one of the most important aspects of their job.

So, let’s clear up this misunderstanding by really understanding what delegation is all about: development, development, development. 

Below are three best practices to help train new managers and leaders on how to have successful delegation conversations:

1. Manage to-do lists.

Anthea Turner, British media personality, said, “The first rule of management is delegation. Don’t try and do everything yourself because you can’t.”

She’s right.

But, it’s far easier said than done — especially for new managers. These new leaders are deeply committed to proving their worth, to making sure that their hire or promotion meets and exceeds all expectations.

One of the predominant ways this shows up, to their detriment, is that they are unwilling to let things go — to delegate — to loosen the reins. The risk just feels too great!

As their learning leader, help them out! Sit down with a new manager or leader and ask them to pull out their to-do list. Chances are high they’ve got some things on there that they admittedly love doing, and other things that they’ve determined no one else knows how to do (at least as well as they do).

The next step, no matter how hard this might be, is asking them whether or not this particular item is central to achieving their goals and supporting their team. If their answer is “no,” then it’s no longer the best use of their time.

Yep — no matter how much they love it or how good they are at it.

Now, look at their to-do list with them again. To whom can they delegate some of these things?

If they need a bit more incentive to give up a task they love or believe no one else can do better than themselves, help them do the math.

How much time will they free up if they let someone else take ownership of this particular responsibility? What else can they do with that time? And what would the benefits be if they could devote energy to other priorities?

Remind them of this: Imagine how much more productive (and fulfilled) you will be when you can focus that much time on things that are the best use of you AND meet your goals!

Once you’ve done the above exercise, encourage new managers to schedule intentional conversations with their direct reports. Invite them to set aside time to let their people know that they want to delegate some new responsibilities.

New managers can then ask: “Are you interested in growing in this area?” The goal is to be curious, to ask even more questions, to get a sense of how the direct report want to develop in their role.

When new leaders are reminded (and learn) to really ask and really listen, they’ll begin to see and understand which of their current responsibilities could be better served by delegating them for another’s development. A gift to them — and to others!

2. Create a common language.

When we teach delegation in the Fierce classroom, we use the analogy of a tree to represent four levels of delegation and decision-making authority: leaf, branch, trunk, and root.

At leaf level, there is full autonomy to make decisions and act on them. That autonomy decreases with each level — but not in a pejorative way. Instead, at root level, for example, the manager delegates a responsibility that still needs her/his input and final decision-making expertise.

At trunk, the direct report makes the decision and the implementation plan but checks in with their manager before taking any next steps. And at branch, the direct report makes the decision, implements the plan, and only keeps the manager in the loop.

These levels provide a common language so that there is a mutual understanding of the decision-making process on any given project or responsibility.

Even more, it mitigates what new leaders too often default to as an excuse for not delegating: the delegatee is not quite ready yet.

What if, instead of not delegating at all, a direct report was given the ability to start delegating to others at trunk-level. This would provide the person the autonomy to do the work in a bound amount of time and with the assurance of the manager’s ongoing expertise until they are ready for more.

Above and beyond mitigating risk, shared language maximizes reward. When people are delegated to effectively — and at levels that are unique to them as individuals — they feel seen and heard, engagement and productivity increase, retention goes up, relationships thrive, and the new manager grows and develops in powerful and relevant ways alongside their direct reports.

If you wandered through our office space at Fierce HQ, you’d overhear conversations that take full advantage of this shared language: “Hey, Ronna! Can you take this on at leaf-level?” Or, “Mike, given that this is within your area of passion, I’d love for you to facilitate this project at branch-level.” Or, “Rose, I know this has been given to me at trunk-level and I really feel like I’m ready to have it at branch. Can we talk about that together?”

Because we understand each other and the level of decision-making authority/autonomy being given, we are able to work together in better and more productive ways.

We have successful, productive conversations because we have a vocabulary that everyone knows and speaks. Even more, it provides new leaders with a framework that teaches them how to delegate and develop their people. Truly, it makes all the difference!

3. Help teams partner up.

As a new leader, it can be tempting to want to be the go-to person for everything. It’s a lofty ideal, but completely unsustainable.

One more relevant quote? “As we look ahead into the next century, leaders will be those who empower others.” Bill Gates, founder of Microsoft.

Let’s take his thinking one step further and develop those new leaders even more.

Help new managers understand ways in which their team members can empower each other! Have them create accountability partnerships, triads, or groups that are designed to keep each other on-track with time-management and deadlines.

They can help their people create check-ins with one another and share their progress. At the end of the day, everyone is encouraged, everyone develops, everyone grows. Including that new manager!

Now, let’s return to where we started. Is delegation the sexiest management technique ever?  Nope. But it IS one that goes far deeper than often understood or practiced. We don’t want our new leaders to be deceived by its seeming-simplicity.

Delegation requires intentionality, skill, and persistence. By teaching new managers to use these three best practices, it will free up their time, maximizes their results, and develops their people. That’s being a Fierce leader, to be sure!

Being in the conversations business, I pay close attention to the discussions I am having with leaders across industries and regions. In the past couple of years, (in North America specifically), I began to notice a particular word creeping its way into our conversations – nice.

On the surface, this shouldn’t seem alarming. Everyone wants to be nice…right?!

Well, not so fast.

This word often came up when leaders would answer the questions: Why aren’t people sharing what they truly think or feel? What keeps people from sharing an opposing view? Well, we want to have a nice culture. Or in some form or another, people wanted to be perceived as nice. 

I’ve also noticed that this perception found no barriers, as I’ve heard this exact phrase throughout various geographies and industries. I was hearing, oh that is because we are Healthcare nice. Nonprofit nice. Canada nice. Midwest nice. 

These dialogues started to prompt the question: Are cultures of nice starting to become an epidemic? Are people tiptoeing around issues, so they don’t seem aggressive or too outright?

And, then it led to my bigger question: What’s going on to make this happen in the first place?!

DIVING DEEPER

Many of the companies Fierce works with have admitted to us that their organizations suffer from a ‘culture of nice,’ where people are afraid to speak openly or confront the behavior of others for fear they may ‘rock the boat’ or be judged as challenging the status quo.

To paint this picture perfectly clear, let me share a specific example: CHRISTUS Health is a faith-based, non-profit health system that has had problems with its employees, at all levels, mistaking their value of compassion with avoiding difficult conversations and sharing feedback.

The reality was that important conversations weren’t happening, and their culture was suffering because of it.

I’ll get into more about how we helped them in a moment, but this example and many others are what drove Fierce to get curious about this niceness problem and conduct more research into the matter. We were on a quest to learn if these cultures of nice were a fluke, or if there was something truly under the surface.

UNDERSTANDING OUR RESEARCH

In April of this year, we surveyed more than 1,000 full-time employees across the U.S. to better understand how niceness shows up in the workplace. We asked them if they’d ever keep concerns or ideas to themselves and if so, what was the reasoning? We wanted to know if they did keep concerns or ideas to themselves, what situations did this happen the most in?

We also wanted to dig into the justification people have for keeping concerns or ideas to themselves at work.  

The results of our research confirmed our observations: we found that nearly 63 percent of employees have chosen not to share a concern or negative feedback at work. When we dug into why, employee said they were fearful of being seen as combative, and thus keep their concerns and negative feedback to themselves.

Here are some of the top findings from our research:

• 8 out of 10 U.S. full-time employees admit they keep concerns to themselves at work because they want to be seen as nice by their colleagues and leadership.
• The top reason for keeping concerns and ideas to themselves at work was they didn’t want to be seen as combative.
• Only 5 percent of employees said being seen as nice wasn’t important.
• 6 out of 10 employees say they have been fearful of voicing a concern at work.
• The least likely places to speak up at work are conversations with company leaders, team meetings, one-on-one with a boss and conversations with colleagues.

Another highlight the data showed was that everyone, regardless of gender or seniority, felt the same when it came to the major findings. The idea of being nice and being afraid to be real is felt by everyone.

Yes. It isn’t an early career intern thing or woman thing. This finding shows that anyone can suffer from a preoccupation of niceness — from your fresh-out-of-college entry-level employee, to the CEO of your company.

The impact of this niceness problem can be incredibly significant not just to an organization, but also to employee mental health. If not addressed, these issues can lead to problems that could be difficult to bounce back from – from significant turnover to direct loss of revenue.

The good news is that all hope is definitely not lost. In fact, we’ve seen this concept of a culture of nice and its negative effects be addressed, overcome, and prevented in several of our clients’ organizations.

Going back to the story of CHRISTUS Health, where employees weren’t talking about what they needed to talk about, they used feedback and skillful confrontation to drive cultural change in their organization. They went from people who were afraid to talk to ones who are honest and open with one another. 

On top of that, it has been good for the business. These people were able to impact real hard numbers:

• 81 percent increase in the retention rate of leaders.
• 36 percent increase in promotion rate within the company.
• 73 percent increase in reaching targeted competencies.

Above all else, they’re all committed together to solving their toughest challenges instead of just being “nice” and letting those missed conversations continue.

TIPS TO OVERCOME NICENESS

Do you suspect that you, your team, or your organization are leaning on the too nice scale? Here are two critical tips to help:

1. Implement a framework for giving, asking for, and receiving feedback.

It is important that people can quickly address issues and questions as they arise. This is possible when people feel confident that they know how, when, and what to say.

Leaders must also regularly ask for feedback to reinforce the significance.

I am very committed to this as a small business leader (and obviously biased as a training company leader). In fact, last week, our entire company went through a Fierce Feedback refresher to continue to hone our skills and make sure that we practice with one another.

The goal is not perfection, but rather intention and continual desire to get better at this skill.    

2. Confront issues quickly and remain curious through the process.

When feedback has not worked, and a behavior or attitude needs to change, confrontation needs to be used. Now, keep in mind that confrontation is not a dirty word. It is an opportunity to get to the heart of why something is happening.

Training this skill is very important, however, and modeling it is just as important.

I’m human, so there are times that I dread a conversation (yes, even as a conversations company leader). I always do it though, and besides the outcomes that I know are only possible when working through the hard stuff, the extra motivation for me is to know that I am setting an example of what I expect for our company.

I can’t ask our Fiercelings to do anything I am not willing to do. Don’t ignore issues you know are happening. Address them directly, clearly, and with good intent.  

We’re all human, and yes, that means we want to be liked by those we work with. That’s a good thing. Our research validates that people don’t want to seem mean or combative.

The dark side is that niceness enables us to keep avoiding the stuff that needs to be said. And before we know it, the stuff has turned into tough stuff because time has made it worse.

The key is to have the skill and confidence to talk about what matters. Every single person can do this. AND It can be learned no matter where you are in your career.

So, when you are inclined to not share what you really think and feel because you want to be perceived a certain way, remember: the nicest thing you can do is be real. 

Ensuring everyone at your organization is skilled in having authentic conversations so you are promoting realness over niceness is critical for business success. Download our whitepaper, The ROI of Skillful Conversation, to dig even deeper into how training conversation skills will positively impact your organization.

In today’s fast-paced environment where innovation is no longer a luxury, it’s no surprise that in my conversations with leaders, the pace of change in organizations and the marketplace is often a focus.

They’re asking questions like: How do I make sure our people have what they need to adapt quicker than ever? What if they fall behind? How do I need to adjust my leadership to make all of the change possible?

One way to ensure that your leaders and teams will succeed is by creating an environment to challenge the status quo. After all, real change starts with you. You must give yourself permission to question the status quo of your organization and invite your team to join you.

Unfortunately, challenging the status quo isn’t something leaders like to do. According to Harvard Business Review, 72 percent of leaders say they never or rarely challenge their status quo, nor do they encourage employees to think outside the box.

If you want to make sure your employees are set up for success and create real, sustainable growth for your organization, you must constantly think about how you can adapt and change. 

Organizations develop a status quo for many reasons. They range from leaders feeling pressured for time, to the struggle to prioritize, to a more systematic issue of an “if it’s not broke, don’t fix it” culture.

WHY THE STATUS QUO IS PROBLEMATIC

It’s important to realize status quo is a bias. It’s a preference that things stay the same. In a sense, it’s an aversion to change. Adhering to this bias is problematic, especially in business, because growth requires change.

Companies and their cultures are living, breathing entities that change with the people who inhabit them. Policies that worked for one generation of employees might fall on deaf ears to the next. Training that was successful for the employees of a mid-size company may no longer be ideal once the organization grows.

Status quo can be comforting because it’s easy —  it doesn’t require us to challenge ourselves or each other. It doesn’t require us to take risks or potentially be wrong with the changes made. Yet, when you follow the status quo, over time, your success will stall because individuals, teams, leaders, and companies will miss out on opportunities for growth, and stagnation becomes the mode of operation.

This is when it’s time to challenge the way it’s been and think about what it can become.

WHAT YOU GAIN FROM SHAKING THINGS UP

Don’t get me wrong, challenging (and changing) the status quo can be scary. It often requires courage and a willingness to go against the grain, while potentially butting heads with others who are less open to new ideas.

Keep in mind that challenging the status quo doesn’t have to mean that something isn’t operating well or that something needs to change. People often have the idea that something has to be wrong before suggesting improvements. Sometimes challenging the status quo simply means proposing a new idea that may be worth exploring — perhaps it’s already great, and is there a way it can be even better?

It’s leadership’s responsibility to create a culture where challenging the status quo is encouraged. Leaders need to have a forward-thinking, growth mindset — a state of mind that doesn’t settle for an attitude of the bare minimum and instead looks to their teams for insights on how things can be improved.

The most successful leaders set out to support new values, policies, and ideas.

A leader also can’t create this kind of culture without action. By asking your team to share their perspectives, you not only build emotional capital with your employees, but you also help build a more productive workforce.

Below are three easy steps to start having these conversations with your team organically so you can start creating something new and say goodbye to your status quo:

1. Invite all perspectives.

As a leader, you may think that certain training or policies are working because no one is saying differently. Have you really asked, though?

If you haven’t, now is the time. Invite differing perspectives from within your organization to examine issues and be thoughtful about whose perspectives can really lend a fresh new point-of-view. The goal should be to get the people who are affected by specific policies and training in the room.

At Fierce, we use the TEAM MODEL to help companies have these types of conversations. The goal is for multiple people to work through an opportunity and challenge, so multiple views can be heard.

2. Ask more questions.

When an employee comes to you and has an issue with the current status quo for the team, company, or a product, take this opportunity to get curious with them and ask these questions:

• Is there something that isn’t working?
• Why isn’t it working?
• How can we fix it?
• Where do you see opportunities for improvement?

Maybe a major overhaul isn’t even in order, and it’s just a simple adjustment that can make everyone more engaged. These one-on-one opportunities with your team are great ways to, little by little, shift away from the current state of affairs towards something more meaningful.

3. Be ready to help the change.

If a team member brings a new idea to the table, keep an open mind. If your default response is one of resistance, and you’re quick to say no, the other person may feel dismissed. This is where you may miss a real opportunity to make an improvement that could benefit the entire company.

Consider all variables, including the resources you have available to implement the idea and explore all avenues you can to make a positive change possible.

PUTTING IDEAS TO ACTION

As a small business leader, I consistently grapple with challenging the status quo. I believe one of my fundamental jobs is to make sure we are focused on the right objectives as an organization, and that our brilliant, capable team has the resources needed to accomplish what we have set out to do.

I think most leaders would agree that this is a central function. However, the rubber really hits the road when my team members bring me ideas or comments about shifting focus or resources. This is the dance of challenging the status quo and taking action.

Here’s a great example:  Our short term strategy has been to improve our core offerings rather than focus on developing net new products. When a leader or team member comes to me with an amazing idea to build X or Y product, it could be easy for me to say, “This doesn’t fit with our strategy.” The issue with that response is that it shuts down further exploration of the status quo of our strategy.

Instead of me responding that way, I remind myself to ask questions and get curious. In a growing and changing business, it’s dangerous to believe that all strategies and focuses are 100 percent spot on, so it’s necessary to invite conversations and get curious.

In the end, at times it has been deemed that the focus should be to stick with the strategy, and other times, the question or recommendation shifted the strategy for the better. I actively thank our Fiercelings for engaging in conversations with me about what’s working and not working so they know their perspectives matter to our organization as a whole.

It’s a constant journey to challenge the status quo, and it’s the essential job of a leader to interrogate reality  — to get clear on what’s truly happening and be open to learning and shifting perspective.

Gone are the days that the President or CEO has all the answers. The job of all leaders is to seek answers, ask good questions, and be a place where fierce conversations can happen.